Kakashi's Birthday
by DiamondCrook
Summary: One shot. It's Kakashi's birthday. Kakashi feels old, Gai has the worst timing, Sasuke finds out something new about his brother, and Kakashi is forced to sleep on the couch.


**This was something I randomly found on my computer. Thought I'd just put it up here. It's just a One Shot. Hope you like. :)**

Kakashi stood in front of his old friend's grave with Itachi right next to him. He was grateful that Itachi was so patient and understanding. Afterall they had been standing there for over two hours already. "Today's my birthday. I can't believe so many years have already passed. I'm sure you probably wouldn't have gotten me anything you greedy bastard. That's okay though. Your present was more than I could ask for. Of course, I'm nowhere near as skilled with it as Itachi. I've spoken about him to you before, but knowing you, you probably already forgot." He grabbed a peice of Itachi's hair and played with it, while he continued. "He's cute right? I think so. I'm sure you probably don't think so. That's fine. You had horrible taste in everything anyways."

Itachi examined the older man who quickly became silent. A somber look formed on his lover's face. He couldn't believe Kakashi came here every morning. He had always wondered where the man had gone when he'd wake up alone. It also explained why he was always late for everything. His punctuality was almost nonexistant.

The man's face quickly perked up and he continued. "Well anyways, this is Itachi Uchiha. I'm sure you already knew that. He looks kind but he's actually really evil. He beats me and makes me sleep on the floor."

Itachi laughed and playfully shoved the older man. "At least I don't have a dopey look on my face like Kakashi. And I don't treat him badly. I should though because he's just a lazy pervert."

Kakashi grabbed Itachi's chin and forced his eyes on him. "Yeah well you're getting married to this lazy pervert someday," he said.

Itachi's eyes widened at the statement. They were gonna get married? Married to a man? Married to Kakashi? He never thought of marriage. It never really appealed to him. He figured he'd be dead before he got married.

"You two are getting married!"

The couple turned their heads to see Naruto in a nearby tree, obviously eavesdropping. Kakashi ignored the teen and leaned in closer. "Hm. Which sounds better? Kakashi Uchiha or Itachi Hatake? I don't know. I like Itachi Hatake better. Don't ya think babe?"

"It does sound a little better, but I don't know why you think I'd take your last name Kakashi."

"Because you love me and you have to do it."

"I do love you. But only a little bit. I was planning on leaving you for that young muscular guy that works at my favorite cafe," Itachi replied with a playful smirk.

Kakashi's eye widened for a split-second, insecurity setting in. "You better not. I see the way he looks at you. I'll kill him," he said through gritted teeth. Itachi shook his head and grabbed the jounin's hand. His eyes drifted over to see Naruto was accompanied by Sakura and Sasuke. They watched them curiously. He wasn't planning on telling his brother about his relstionship with Kakashi. He just assumed one day he'd walk in on them and that no explanation would be needed.

"Do you hear that Obito? What a bad boyfriend. I should probably get going though. I'm sure I've been boring you. Anyways I'll come by soon," he said before pulling Itachi away .

"SO wait...lemme get this straight...YOU and HIM...together? Like boyfriend and girlfriend?"

"Yep," Kakashi replied, still looking down at his book. Itachi kicked the older man's calf in retaliation. Not like boyfriend and girlfriend. And if anything, he was certainly not the girlfriend. "Oww. Domestic abuse."

Naruto stared at the two for a minute before he started screaming like a maniac. "You pervert! This whole time you were saying gay shit to me, you were serious! Oh my god! You were hitting on me for years!"

Itachi narrowed his eyes and turned to Kakashi, waiting for him to elaborate on what Naruto was talking about. 'Strike One Hatake,' he mentally said.

Kakashi chuckled nervously at the evil glare he was getting and rubbed the back of his neck, thinking of what to say. "I wasn't actually hitting on him. He just assumed I was. I swear."

Naruto wouldn't hear any of it. He covered his mouth and swallowed the bile that was trying to make it's way up his throat. "You sexually assaulted me! 1000 Years of Death was just a jutsu you made up so you could feel me up, wasn't it! WHYY! OH GOD!"

Kakashi looked back and from the older Uchiha and the teenager who was on the verge of having a mental breakdown."Naruto I was never trying to come onto you!"

"I don't wanna hear it! SICKO! Stay away from me!" he screamed as he ran off in some random direction.

Itachi raised his brow at his boyfriend. "What's A Thousand Years of Death? I've never heard of this."

"Uhh...ummm... I'll demonstrate it on you later...Wait up! Naruto!" Kakashi yelled. He turned to Itachi who merely shook his head and motioned for him to go follow the blonde. Although, the last thing he wanted was to face his younger brother and the lovestruck teenage girl. But it was better than having Naruto running wild through the village blabbing about their personal life during his screaming fit. He looked towards Sakura who was merely looking down at the ground trying to hide her blush. Itachi didn't care too much what the girl thought about the news. The one whose approval mattered the most was standing a few feet away.

"Sasuke. Is this okay with you?" he asked, not really sure if he wanted to even hear his answer. The teen smirked at his older brother and shrugged his shoulders.

"Why not? You never cease to suprise me Itachi," he replied. "Let me tell you one thing though. I swear if I end up seeing one inch of Kakashi's gross naked old man body in our house, I will not hesitate to kill you both."

Itachi laughed and nodded his head.

The pink haired girl finally spoke up. "Um...if you don't mind me asking...how did this end up happening? Not that I'm not happy for you two. It's great. Real great. It's just suprising that he would choose you...WAIT! No! that came out wrong! There's nothing wrong with you at all! I swear! You're very attractive! Not that I like you like that. But I'm sure that's why Kakashi likes you...Uhhh...Not that he would only like you because of how you look! Because I know Kakashi's not that superficial. I...ugh nevermind."

The two brothers stared at her in mild amusement and confusion, before Itachi spoke up. "Thank you for the compliment... I think. And to answer your question, me and Kakashi have known each other for a long time, so it's not some spur of the moment thing. And well, I don't feel comfortable talking about everything, so I'll just leave it at that."

Sakura nodded and quietly excused herself. She had to go and tell Ino. This was too juicy to keep to herself. Plus, gossip on Kakashi was the best kind of gossip, especially when it involved someone like Itachi Uchiha.

"She's probably gonna tell all her little girl friends," Sasuke said as he watched the girl run away. Itachi shrugged and began walking in the direction of Kakashi's favorite bookstore. He had reserved him a copy of his favorite book series two months ago and they finally arrived in the store today. Sasuke walked alongside his brother. He couldn't help but smile. It felt just like old times. "Hey Itachi. Wanna give me a piggy back ride?"

Itachi crouched down in front of Sasuke. "Okay get on," he said, being completely serious.

"I was kidding. Get up. People are staring."

"Who cares? They can stare all they want. Don't be a baby Sasuke. A little embarassment never hurt anyone."

He narrowed his eyes at his older brother and took a quick glance around, before getting onto his back. Itachi struggled a bit. "You got fat," he mumbled.

"Maybe you just got weaker."

"You're right," Itachi replied. They walked in silence for a ten minutes, before they stopped in front of the bookstore. "Rides over Sasuke. We have arrived at our destination," he said, practically throwing Sasuke off his back. He walked into the store and over to the cashier. Sasuke sighed and followed his brother inside. Why were they even here? It had to be a book for Kakashi. There was no way his brother was into these kinds of things.

He looked around the small store, unable to avoid the giant breasts that were practically popping out of the magazines, ready to poke his eyeballs out. His face contorted in disgust. Why would anyone want to have a chest that gigantic? And what was so appealing about it? Maybe Itachi felt the same way? Did Itachi like women at all? He had never spoken about any girls or he's never really paid any attention to the opposite sex. Then again he never mentioned liking men, let alone someone like Kakashi Sensei. It was so strange and random. Wait, did that make him gay? None of the women on those magazine's really interested him. He froze in fear at the possibility that he could be...

"You're not old enough for those kinds of things Sasuke."

The teen's eyes practically bulged out of his head. Itachi thought he wanted one of these magazines? "I know. And they're all gross anyways," he mumbled as he walked out of the store and down the street. Itachi chuckled at his brother's embarrassment and ran to catch up with him.

Sasuke was stopped dead in his tracks when Kakashi suddenly appeared in front of him. He smiled at the two brothers and waved at Itachi, who finally caught up to Sasuke. "Yo."

"W-where's that Teme?" he asked. For once, he needed to seek out his friend's help.

"He went over to your house looking for you," he replied, not really paying attention to the teenager. He was more interested in his older brother. His eye darted to the bag he was holding. "Hey, babe what did you buy?"

"None of your business," Itachi replied coldly. He pushed his way past him, holding onto the bag tightly. His boyfriend was too nosey for his own good. He wouldn't be surprised if Kakashi attempted to steal the bag away. The older man only grew more curious of course as he watched Itachi walk away holding the bag against his chest.

"Stop checking my brother out. I'm mad at you. Dirty old pervert."

Kakashi nodded, not really hearing a word he was saying. "Uhhuh Uhhuh...I'm glad Sasuke. See you later," he replied, before jogging over to Itachi who had stopped walking. "I think everyone knows about us already and even worse, that it's my birthday. And I'm sure Gai was the one who blabbed to everyone in the village about it."

"Yeah. I wouldn't be suprised if he was planning a surprise party right now."

Kakashi shot Itachi a mortified look. "Do you know something I don't?"

"No. I don't know what that man does in his free time, nor do I ever want to find out."

He knew Kakashi didn't like his birthday. And the man specifically told him not to get him anything. Itachi knew Kakashi was in a bad mood ever since his disturbing wakeup call by Gai this morning. The Uchiha wasn't pleased about it either. No one needs to be greeted by a shouting Gai Sensei at their window when they're in the middle of foreplay. The two sighed in annoyance as they thought back to the morning's events.

* * *

><p><em>Itachi lied in bed, contemplating what to do as he stared at Kakashi's erection. He was never one to initiate anything sexual. Hell, Kakashi literally had to force him out of his clothes everynight just so they could sleep naked together. Which he still didn't understand why the man was so adamant about it. He found it rather strange. Then again he only had a few sexual experiences and they were only with the man lying next to him. Perhaps it was a normal thing people did. But, could he do THIS? What if Kakashi got mad? He knew how cranky he was in the morning. But wouldn't this be a nice way to wake up? He believed so. Plus Kakashi was always horny when they were alone. And it was his birthday.<em>

_He carefully slipped the blanket off of his body and crawled toward's his lover's arousal. Itachi leaned down until his lips barely brushed the tip of Kakashi's cock. He watched the older man's face from the corner of his eye, as he ran the tip of his tongue up the thick vein on the underside of his cock. Kakashi's cock twitched making the Uchiha's eyes widen in surprise. He watched the man for a second, to make sure he hadn't woken him, before he slid the tip into his mouth._

_"Mmmm," he hummed as he sucked eagerly on the head. Itachi couldn't deny he loved pleasuring Kakashi like this. A moan escaped Kakashi's mouth and his hips bucked up, pushing his cock deeper into his lover's mouth. Itachi held his hair back with one hand and wrapped the other around the base of Kakashi's cock. He sucked hungrily taking in his lover's taste. God Kakashi tasted so good._

_Kakashi groaned as he slowly began to wake up. His eyes shot open and was met with his lover's eyes staring back up at him. "Oh babe... what the hell are you doing?"_

_What was he doing? Wasn't it obvious? He reluctantly pulled his mouth away and stared at the slick member. "Do you not like it?" he asked, as he ran his index finger up his shaft._

_Kakashi rubbed his hands over his face, trying to wake himself up. Itachi was sucking his dick while he was sleeping? Why would he do that? Wait. Why was he even asking that question? Who questions something like that? Was he getting so old that he didn't even want sex anymore? He laughed at the idea, which caught the Uchiha's attention._

_Itachi's eyes widen and a mortified look spread on his face for a split second. "I'm sorry I don't know what I was thinking."_

_Kakashi smirked at the insecure looking Uchiha. He sat up and grabbed his lover's face with both hands."Well this is a nice present to wake up to, don't you think?" Itachi slowly nodded his head and began stroking the man's cock._

_"A kid called me grandpa yesterday," he mumbled._

_Itachi chuckled at the random statement and slowed his hand's movements. "Maybe it's your hair Kakashi. Don't be so negative about getting older though. You age very nicely."_

_Kakashi fell back down onto his back and ran a hand through his hair. "It's all down hill after thirty though."_

_"Mmmm you're being a drama queen," he replied, before taking Kakashi back into his mouth. Kakashi merely grunted and watched his lover's head bob up and down. He slipped Itachi's hairtie off and ran his fingers through the silky black hair._

_"Fuck...that's because you're...oh god...you're still young," the older man panted._

_Itachi slowly slid his mouth back up Kakashi's length and gave the slightly reddened tip one last lick, before crawling up the man's body. "Thirty one isn't old Kakashi. Besides, I like that you're older. Makes you so much sexier," Itachi whispered as he ran a hand over Kakashi's toned chest and stomach._

_The statement made Kakashi's eyes roll back, and he swiftly reversed their positions. His hands grabbed the back of Itachi's thighs and pushed them up. "Hold your legs and don't complain," he ordered. Itachi's eyes widened and he did what he was told. "Now, will you be able to keep it down this time? Or am I going to be forced to gag you?"_

_Itachi moaned and pulled his legs as far back as he could. Kakashi was being so hot and demanding._

_"My, my Itachi. I didn't know you were so flexible. You look so sexy with your legs pulled all the way back towards your head. You're such a slut," he spat._

_Itachi moaned as he felt Kakashi's finger force it's way inside him. "N-no se-sensei," he stuttered. He pulled at his hair and shot Kakashi a lustful look._

_Kakashi licked his lips at the seductive look Itachi was giving him. "You must be telling the truth. I've never felt such a tight hole before. Is my little 'Tachi a virgin?"_

_Itachi nodded even though he obvously wasn't. But if this was what Kakashi wanted to do, then he would play along. "P-please do-don't Sensei. I'm saving myself for someone else," Itachi whispered, doing his best to sound as innocent as possible. He knew exactly what buttons to push and he knew how overprotective and jealous Kakashi was._

_Kakashi's left eye shot open and he moved his finger faster. Itachi let out a loud moan and arched his back off the bed. "Saving yourself for someone else? I don't think so. The only person you're saving yourself for is me and I'll be stealing any ounce of innocence you have left really soon. Do you fucking understand me?"_

_Itachi's eyes rolled back and he pushed against his lover's hand. "Y-yes Kakashi Sensei, I understand. Thank you...thank you for wanting to take my virginity."_

_A head of shiney black hair popped up through the window. "KA-KASHI HAPPY BIRTH-Duhh...oh...god..." Gai stared wide eyed, at the two. The birthday boy shot him an evil glare and covered Itachi as best he could with a blanket._

_"Get. Out!"_

_Gai didn't need to be told twice._

_"Well that just ruined the mood and you're not hard anymore Sensei," Itachi mumbled, pointing to Kakashi's softened erection._

* * *

><p>"We have to finish what we started once we get home," Kakashi said as rubbed his hands together in a creepy way.<p>

Itachi shook his head and looked down at the bag in his hands. "I know you told me not to buy you something but I did anyways. I was going to wait to give it you but it looks like you'll suffer a stroke if I don't show you."

"Mm. I suppose you can give it to me," Kakashi replied, although he was mentally jumping up and down with excitement and curiousity.

Itachi nodded and reached into the bag. He gave his curious boyfriend a quick glance before pulling the book out. "Happy Birthday." Kakashi stood in shock as he stared at the new Icha Icha book. He ripped the book out of Itachi's hand and slowly opened it. The Uchiha rolled his eyes at how overdramatic Kakashi was being. He found it cute, nontheless.

"Thanks baby. It's one of the best presents I've ever gotten."

Itachi hugged him back and basked in the warm embrace. Itachi was exhausted and his lover's body was welcoming and smelled good. "Good. Now if you dont mind. Can we please go home Kakashi?"

"Tired?"

Itachi nodded and leaned more of his body onto the older man. Kakashi wrapped an arm around Itachi's waist and they slowly made their way back to the Uchiha's house. Halfway through the younger man managed to fall asleep standing up. They made quite a scene when Kakashi had to carry Itachi home. Most people just looked on curiously while most of Konoha's female population oggled over them like they were the cutest thing they'd ever seen. He was certain that some suffered severe bloodloss as well.

He opened the front door and there stood Gai in a ridiculous party hat with a room full of people behind him. "KA-KASHI! HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY ETERNAL RIVAL!"

Itachi fell onto the floor with a loud thud. He shot Kakashi an evil glare for dropping him and embarassing him in front of all these people. "Strike Two Hatake," he mumbled as he slowly stood up with the help of his brother.

Itachi was beyond exhausted. It took him hours to get everyone out of his house. Not to mention that he had a mess to clean up in the morning because of them. He wouldn't have been as mad if Kakashi had enjoyed the party. But Kakashi was miserable and annoyed the whole time. Between Sasuke and Naruto's bickering, Yamato and Tsunade's drunken antics and Kakashi's perverted wandering hands, Itachi was suprised he wasn't dead of a heart attack. Not to mention that a certain someone was driving him to the brink of insanity.

Itachi grunted and pulled the blanket over his head. He rarely ever lost his temper but he was seconds away from beating the shit out of Kakashi. He swore the man took his kindness for granted sometimes. All the little quirks that made up Kakashi, he let slide, he even found some cute but the man had crossed the line too many times. Kakashi raised his brow and glanced over at the younger man under the covers.

Itachi pulled down the blanket and stared back at him with one of the scariest looks on his face. "Do you know what time it is Kakashi?" Kakashi glanced over at the clock on the nighstand. 4:46 am. He was up all night reading? He hadn't even noticed it was this late or early. "You have five seconds to turn off the lights and go to bed before I chop your balls off and shove them up your ass," he warned.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Forgive me." He shut the book and slipped it under his pillow. He shut off the light but the rising sun illuminated the room. Itachi was going to kill him! He jumped off the bed and shut the curtains, before crawling back into bed.

Kakashi turned onto his side and watched Itachi's face as he attempted to fall back asleep. He lifted the blanket and stared at the man's naked body for a moment before speaking up. "I know you're mad and all, but what do you say to some morning s-"

Itachi stopped Kakashi and pointed to the bedroom door. "Out of the room motherfucker!"

'Strike Three Hatake. Have fun sleeping on the couch for a week.'


End file.
